Are Women Attracted To Muscular Men?
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The reason many guys work out in the gym is to become more attractive to women. I mean let’s face it, we guys (and gals) often do a lot of things to become attractive to the opposite sex. Women often spend countless numbers of hours doing their hair, putting on makeup, shopping for the right dresses and accessories, and so on. Why? Because they want to become more attractive and find love. Guys often become workaholics, become obsessed with making money or with working out in the gym to become these good-looking hunks. Why? Because deep inside what we want most is to be loved as well. The yearning for love is a very strong force in our lives and ultimately it dictates much of our behavior. We often try to change or do things to win over more love, or we try to protect ourselves from the pain and hurt associated from losing it.
This article was inspired by one of my friends who works out a lot, and as a guy he, of course, wanted to know: do women find muscular men attractive and will bulking up make him even more attractive ☺? Well, the answer may surprise you. The truth is that it depends. Why? The simple reason is that the attraction between men and women often develops differently. As I briefly discussed in one of my previous articles, “Do Men Just Want Sex? Should My Decision Be To Wait Or Not To Wait?” men are attracted to women physically first. Women, on the other hand, usually develop a mental attraction to men first.
Men are visual. This is why we sometimes stare at a woman’s breasts while she is talking. ☺ I am not trying to justify our bad behavior, but I am simply stating the obvious to make my point. However, you don’t often find many women staring at the guy’s breasts while he is talking no matter how muscular he is. Why? Because women aren’t initially attracted to men physically in the same way.
Men place great importance on how a woman looks when deciding whether he finds her attractive or not. Because of this, many men mistakenly think that this is how an attraction also develops in women. In other words, since we men place so much importance on her looks, we then also think that by working out and becoming more muscular, we will also become more attractive to women. However, this is not always the case.
On another note, we guys are often hypnotized by the media to associate with one particular body type or look to be attractive. However, by realizing that it is possible to have great physical chemistry with all types of women who may look very different from one another, you will free yourself from having to pursue only those who fit your definition of what “attractive” is supposed to be.
Back to how attraction often develops differently in women. As I mentioned, women usually develop a mental attraction to a guy first. This means that first she finds some particular attribute attractive in a guy. It may be the way he smiles, or the way he opens the door to someone, or the way he carries himself, the way he plays baseball with confidence, the way he communicates with people, the way he appears to be caring to others, etc. As she sees him, she begins to build a mental picture of who this guy is and what he may represent. If she starts to find this guy attractive, she may then start to fantasize how it might feel to be with him based on the picture she has created. Of course, this may have nothing to do with the way the guy really looks or sometimes even who he really is.
Now don’t misunderstand me. The truth is that women often are attracted to good-looking, muscular men. But what women are more attracted to is what these muscular and fit men represent rather than how they physically look. Men that are in great physical shape often represent someone who takes care of himself and his health; a guy that has goals and ambitions; a guy that may have lots of testosterone and a healthy sex drive, etc. It may be these attributes rather than this guy’s raw physical looks that can be a big turn-on for women. When you as a guy feel good about yourself and the way you look, you will often appear more confident, more purposeful, more reliable, etc. All of this will make you even more attractive in her eyes.
So why is it then, that some muscular good-looking guys can also be a big turnoff to women? Unfortunately, if you seem obsessed with bodybuilding and the way you look, and are more interested in your own looks than in the way she looks, you suddenly become very unattractive. A guy that is self-absorbed, caring only about himself, can be a big turnoff to women no matter what his physique looks like. This is the main reason that many women turn off. To some women, the more muscle you have after a certain point, the more self-absorbed you will appear, and the less desirable or attractive she will feel with you.
So it is not the size of your muscles, but the size of your character that counts more. Of course, a little muscle won’t hurt and may even help you in the dating game. ☺ But just remember that women want to be adored and desired. In fact, whenever you show more interest in her than in yourself, you will always appear more attractive in her eyes no matter how you look, muscular or not.
Wishing you good luck in love and dating,
Mikko Kemppe
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